don't wanna end October

break
through
move
stay
confused
peace
help
alone
......
how to conclude the end of october?
I can't simply draw a full-stop
so many things haven't done and haven't settled done
and i only have two hands, my own two hands
and the heart not even dare to hope
november ..... oh november

A productive rainy day off

Unusually, I have got this Sunday off and fortunately it's raining all the day. But a rainy day off doesn't mean a shitty day, it's been a productive day today.

I practiced my work intensely today, focused on human hands, the most difficult, but challenging part. With 2 cups of coffee, I managed to focus on details very well.

Human hands are so interestingly complicated and diverse. Skin, bones, nails, texture, thickness, length, so on and so forth are all distinctively different from person to person, not to mention each pair of hands is capable of difference fields. God must make human hands with his/her own hands with great details. 

A good night sleep

Maybe all in my life, I am just seeking a decent place where I can have a good-night sleep every night. Maybe all the purpose of my little life, is just to fulfil this simple aim. Yet, ironically, it's not even close to my dream.

Everywhere I stay, in the hectic city or green countryside I would have noisy flatmates/housemates or neighbours making sound in all possible ways at all different times, slamming the doors, dropping tiny little things, opening fridge loudly at the middle of the night, and the list goes on. I have earplugs to minimize the columns from the surroundings already, but there are always noise to wake me up all the times.

Why do we need to sleep? Why am I feeling sleepy again, but I want to write more. I need more time to do my personal word. I need the vitality to carry on this practice to reach my final end which I set for my little life.

I don't beg god for more time to live, but more energy to carry on my night work. Please.....

Is life that boring?

When everybody complains that life is boring, I finally find some spare time to practice my hobby and making life a little more interesting than ever here in Australia. I have so done with those so called loneliness. Enough. I am numb now.

My married colleague and my single fiends are all telling me they are bored. Busy working city life or relaxed western lifestyle, they all feel bored every now and then. Some sound so desperate. Is life that boring?

Positive mental illness

Falling in love is a mental illness that results in having sweet feelings.
There is no need to deny that are all sick in one way or another. Sick or well is just different ways in description and preception, like a half full glass of water would be viewed as half empty.

What if I died tomorrow?

This has become my motto recently. What if I died tomorrow? This is possible, no joking.

I could die anytime. I could run over by a car when I crosse the road. Anything falling from the sky could hit and kill me instantly. I could be robbed, stabbed, and died from lost of too much blood. I could have a heart attack after running and die straight away. I could die in many other ways, too. It's rather a miracle that I survived today.

Nothing matters any more if you realize it. Nothing hurts anymore, everything is just an incidence in the course of life. It's okay if you have lead a life to the upmost level out of your capibility.